In the center, strength feels safe because it is honorable, capable, substantial, firm, and fortified. Strength gets things done, even the difficult things. But when strength moves to its extremes, it becomes anything but honorable and far from respectable. Extreme strength morphs into domination and control. Obsessed with power, it becomes dictatorial, authoritarian, even brutal. It becomes an out-of-control bully who believes it can force those around them to succumb. We have all witnessed extreme strength. It can terrify us, feel unhinged, out-of-control and certainly feel like an experience we want to get away from.
Entitlement’s goal is to always move us toward the extreme ends of any given spectrum. In their extremes, centered feelings, such as hope, duty, love, honor, compassion, and gratitude, are ground down into their opposites. One thing that extreme warmth and strength have in common is that they both become rigid, angry, and horribly disfigured versions of their centered truths.
When we picture a tree in our mind, we rarely imagine the elaborate network of roots that reaches underground, sprawling out in a vast nodal web that reflects the branches above. Although they resemble each other and are technically part of the same tree, the roots and branches behave differently. The roots form the strength; the sturdy foundation of the tree. They do not dance in the wind like the branches but are unmoving and provide stability. They hold their ground. The roots must be strong for the tree to endure the storm.
When we find ourselves lost in extremes of entitled opposition, we begin to imagine ourselves as superior. If we are “root” people with power/strength-oriented root beliefs and values, we can convince ourselves that we work harder, are more deserving, and have more importance.